Category: Running Battles with the Law

The Carrot and the Stick: Local Flavor

Roger MitchellLeave a comment

Oh, my! I found this flyer posted on a bulletin board recently. My response was inevitable. I just cannot be quiet. The compelling need to expound and elaborate on the public promotion of “compassionate government” displayed is too much for me to resist. After all, what you don’t know CAN hurt you. And your dog, especially if the mutt is NOT registered, recorded, chipped, jabbed, neutered, and protected.

The Carrot: “If your dog gets loose and has a Town of Stevensville tag, we can contact you and aid in reuniting you with your dog.”

Isn’t that nice! Government at its very best!! The Town of Stevensville has a vested interest in making sure that you and your beloved dog are not separated, but if you are, it will do whatever it can to bring you back together. What a beautiful idea! After all, love for its citizens and taxpayers is one of the hallmarks of government, especially at the local level, where names and faces are connected. Council forbid that anyone should run the risk of losing their dog!

The Stick: “If you live in town limits, it is a town ordinance, and you can be cited for having an unlicensed dog. Resolution No. 536.”

Ah, out comes the club. You will license your dog, dammit, or else! Unlicensed dogs will not be allowed or tolerated. Don’t even try. Don’t think you can get away with Breaking the Law! Conform. Comply. Obey. Or else!

The Conditions: Your dog’s vaccinations must be current and up to date. If they are not, the implied message is that you will be denied a license to “own” a dog, which means that you are in violation of Resolution No. 536. See the Town Clerk on your way out to pay the tax, er, I mean, fine. BTW, this requirement is for your own good, since everyone knows that “unvaxxed” dogs are a threat and a menace to other dogs which have already been “jabbed and boosted”. Y’know, kind of like the Covid thing. But, one can never be too safe and if it means that the “safe and effective” shots must be mandated, well, then, that is the price you pay for freedom and the “right” to have a dog.

The Cost: $10.00, due and payable every year from now until forever, unless the rate is increased, at which time you will be notified. Oh, one exception. If you are a “Senior Citizen” (meaning you have reached the hallowed status of Old Age by some quirk of nature), you are entitled to a 50% discount on the cost of your dog’s license, because the Town of Stevensville knows what a burden it is for its richest citizens to be told to cough up an extra five bucks a year. More probably, it knows that older people are politically active AND THEY VOTE, which explains everything.

But wait, as the TV ads shriek, there’s more.

Not only are you forbidden to keep a dog without paying the “toll”, but you must also reach deep into your wallet if you want to have a rabbit, a chicken, or a duck. However, because these are exotic species (more so than the plain, mundane dog), the fee demanded is increased to $25.00, also presumably due and payable annually. That’s right. If you want to keep a rabbit in your house as a pet, you must buy permission from the Town, which is always looking out for your welfare. Just think about it. Should the rabbit escape and go on the lam, at least the Town will know where it is supposed to be and will make every effort to get it home “safely”, that is, if it is also tagged properly. There is nothing listed here about price breaks for the “sainted gray hairs”, however. Maybe the Town is trying to discourage its oldsters from engaging in the practice of cuddling rabbits.

Chickens? Ducks? Pay up! Just do it. I am surprised, however, that there is no mention of vaccination records for these species. With all the hype and hoopla of “Avian Flu epidemics” and the controlled, government mandated killings of millions and millions of birds, a rational person would think that the Town of Stevensville would at least make noises about “safety” in this regard. But, nope. Crickets. Which only goes to show the extent of the compassion the Town has for its most vulnerable citizens. Better to simply price them out of the market.

(Disclaimer: In just a little over a month, I will experience my 66th birthday and I have had gray hair for years. I do not, however, have any sympathy for the “victim” mentality of the Boomer generation. I think that if a price break were to be given to anyone, it should be a young couple with kids who are just getting started in adult life. They need help.)

One question I have for the Town is why they did not include cats, horses, or cattle into this mix? What about guinea pigs which are almost as loud as rabbits, but stink more. What about canaries? Or because geese were excluded, does that mean that someone can put up a pair of honkers in their back yard? For that matter, an unrestrained boa constrictor is probably more of a threat than a dog (at least to those who keep pet mice), yet nothing is said about those. Why doesn’t the Town simply outlaw ALL animal husbandry (oops, bad word) unless express permission is granted, with the appropriate requisite fee being paid, of course.

Of course.

Oh, my! It’s a good thing I don’t live within the town limits or there would be trouble. More than likely, I would have to run for a seat on the Council simply to create opposition for this kind of shakedown. Because that is literally what it is. A shakedown. As it is, I’ll just raise a ruckus from the safety of my own space not far from the scene of the crime and maybe, just maybe, someone else may sit up and take notice.

Let’s get real, here. A license is nothing more than permission granted by a recognized authority to an individual with regard to conducting some manner of activity. Permission. Permission granted. Permission denied. Call it whatever you want, but boiled down to the bare essence, it means that someone, somewhere, decides what you can and cannot do. And then charges you for the purpose of officially stamping a document.

Your papers, please. As freedom-loving citizens of the United Socialist State of America, we love it and clamor for more.

God help us!

Bogging down the Bureaucracy

Roger MitchellLeave a comment

Friday afternoon, when it became evident that I wasn’t going to get my trailer registered or licensed with the State of Montana, I hooked it up and drove to Missoula anyway. I had been given some firewood which I wanted to get and didn’t have any other way to move it. Fortunately, I wasn’t stopped or ticketed for “transgressing” the Law, but if I had been, I had an answer ready.

The clerk had given me a form to complete when I had the inspection done and I still had that in my truck. If necessary, I would have told the cop my story, pulled out the form, and asked him to inspect the trailer then and there. If I was on my way to Missoula, I would have been looking for a police officer and grateful for his assistance. (This was true, to a degree, although it was a very small part of  the equation.)If I was travelling back home, it would have been that the trailer had been in Missoula (which was also true) and that I was taking it home to unload it so that I could have it inspected.

It’s amazing the novel ways a person can come up with to sidestep the strictures that the State seeks to place on him.

P.S. If anyone takes exception to my methods, please keep in mind that I fully intend to have the trailer inspected, approved, registered, and licensed. I’m just not horribly concerned about getting it done immediately. All in good time. Everything comes to those who wait.

P.P.S. I checked the VIN# on the trailer against the one on the (valid) Florida registration and discovered that the VIN was indeed correct. Why did it show up on her computer as invalid? I don’t know, but I can think of at least four reasons, the least damning being that she simply made a mistake inputting the number. Ah, well, get the doggone thing inspected and tagged, and give them what they want–my hard-earned dollars.

 

Small Town Bureaucracy

Roger Mitchell2 Comments

I thought it would be easy.

When we moved from Florida to Montana almost two years ago, we used a small trailer to carry our belongings. Due to a shortage of funds, I did not register or license it right away. The other day, however, I had the money and wanted to get it done so that I could use it without worrying about blue lights flashing in my rear-view mirror because of the expired Florida tag.

I thought it would be easy, but since the registration and licensing requires interaction with bureaucrats, I should have known better. Friday morning, I drove to Hamilton (approx. 25 miles) and went into the appropriate office, where I stood in line for at least 30 minutes. When I was finally able to approach the clerk and tell her what I wanted, her immediate response was to inform me that since I didn’t have a title with me, she couldn’t process the request. End of story. End of session. Move on! Next!!

On my way back home to get the title, I realized I didn’t have a title to the trailer, since Florida doesn’t issue titles for trailers which have a net weight of less than 2000 pounds and mine only carries a net of 1100. When I got home, I went to the “official” Florida DMV website, printed out the page which declared this, and drove back to Hamilton. At the licensing office, I again stood in line until I was summoned, “Next!”. The clerk was a different woman and I simply told her that I had brought the trailer with me from Florida and wanted to register it here. When she asked me about the title, I told her that Florida doesn’t issue them for this size. She confirmed this online and immediately pulled out a plate and slapped it on the counter in front of me.

I thought it would be easy, but I should have known better. She wanted to know what the make and model of  the trailer was, but I had to tell her that I didn’t know that. She informed me that she couldn’t proceed any further without the make and model. I asked her if I could check it out when I got home and call her with the information, but was turned down. I informed her that this was the second trip I had made to Hamilton that day and I didn’t want to have to make another one, but it didn’t make any difference. She had to have the make and model. Then, to top it off, she informed me that the VIN# shown on my Florida registration was not valid, and that I would have to have the trailer inspected by a police officer to verify the correct number. She gave me a form and told me that nothing more would be done until the inspection was complete.

At that point, what could I do? I told her that I understood she was only doing her job, but that this episode showed why it is so difficult to get anything done, to which she just looked at me, shrugged her shoulders, and made it very plain that I should move on and quit wasting her time. Next!!

Here’s the Catch-22. I cannot move the trailer “legally” on the highway because it is not licensed or registered with the State of Montana. I cannot license or register it until it is inspected by a police officer. I cannot get it inspected unless I take it to a police officer, which would require moving it on the highway. Potentially, I could be given a ticket for taking it to an inspection in order to make it legal. More than likely, this would not happen, but it could and, if it did, I could be forced to pay a fine for attempting to comply with the law.

What a joke! If it wasn’t so serious, it would be funny. However, this is the way that government works. My question is this. As long as I am not harming someone by towing my trailer, why should I have to jump through all the hoops to make it “legal”? If there is no harm done to anyone because I tow it down the road, why should I have to even have it registered or licensed? Unless I cause harm to someone with that trailer, why should the State of Montana even care that I am towing it on the road? Obviously, because it wants to control me, my actions, and my behavior and it wants to be paid for “enforcing the law”.

There are only two real answers to these questions–control and money. Everything else is peripheral to these two items. The clerk at the office in Hamilton doesn’t care about anything except her salary, which she ensures by forcing everyone else to submit to the control of the law. The bureaucrat who wrote the law doesn’t care about anything except his salary, which he ensures by constantly proposing and writing new regulations . The legislator from this district doesn’t care about anything except that he be re-elected next term, so that he can continue to draw a salary by exerting control over his constituents. Etc., etc., all the way to the top. Governor, US Congressman, President. They don’t care. Write rules, collect money.

Needless to say, this whole sorry episode made me quite upset and put a heavy damper on the rest of my day. Not to mention that I still have to look forward to “The Inspection” and make another trip back to Hamilton for a third try at the gauntlet. Until then, I’ll move my trailer when and where I want to, whether it is Montana approved or not.