Recently, I was involved in a “debate” on the Unz Review concerning the Golden Rule and its (supposedly better, certainly more modern) re-interpretation, the Platinum Rule. This was sparked by a comment I made at an article by one, Caitlin Johnstone, a popular blogger, who is not afraid to blast what she sees as unjust, immoral, and wrong. I salute her for the well-meaning intent, but take issue with some of her stances. Our philosophical differences have no bearing on the current subject. If you read this article and scroll down through the links, you will find my initial comment as #5, from which you can read replies by other commenters and my own replies to them.
https://www.unz.com/cjohnstone/im-not-political-just-means-i-support-the-status-quo
During the course of this “conversation”, someone brought up the idea that the Platinum Rule was superior to the Golden Rule with respect to the relationship between people. I had to admit that I had never heard of the Platinum Rule before and, more than likely, you may not have either. There is an enormous amount of information on the Internet about it. Just type the key words, platinum rule, into your browser. However, for those who can’t be bothered, the tension between the Golden Rule and the Platinum Rule reads like this:
- Golden Rule: “Treat others as you want them to treat you.”
- Platinum Rule: “Treat others as they want to be treated.”
Apparently, the main sticking point in the Golden Rule for some people is that they read it as selfish and self-centered. It is a manipulative system in which you give others what you desire for yourself and you expect to receive it as compensation for your “giving”. Honestly speaking, this is no different than the attitude and belief that many Christians have when they drop cash in the “offering” plate at their weekly gathering on Sunday morning. I don’t see it that way and I am quite certain that Jesus didn’t mean it as such. See more on that below.
On the other hand, treating others as they want to be treated can lead to disaster. Ask yourself, how would someone like Benjamin Netanyahu want to be treated, and the problem becomes immediately clear. How does Donald Trump want to be treated? How does an abusive, philandering husband or a perpetually victimized wife want to be treated? Giving someone everything that they wish for is a recipe for disaster and must be avoided religiously, at all costs, because there are times when people like that need a good, swift kick in the ass and a reprimand, which is most definitely NOT what they want.
The main problem I find with the Platinum Rule is that it is nothing more than a cleaned up, sanitized, and more professional version of the Golden Rule. The Platinum Rule appeals to “educated” people–psychologists, group leaders, human resource administrators, politicians, etc., and others who specialize in molding and directing people into their own mode of thinking. In reality, it is a clinical take on what Jesus taught 2000 years ago, but is no different in essence, as long as it is not self-seeking.
Eventually, after some give and take in the discussion, I posted this response which has not been answered nor challenged. In fact, there is no good rebuttal to the main thrust of my argument. Sometimes, silence speaks louder than words.
“After some reading on this subject, I have decided that there really is no substantial difference between the Golden Rule and the Platinum Rule. They are flip sides of the same coin. The wording is different but the principle behind them is the same. The whole argument is one of semantics and arguing over which one is better only muddies the water.”
“Whether one treats others from the perspective of the Golden Rule or approaches from the Platinum Rule, the core issue remains and can be phrased by this question. At the most basic level, what is the one desire which everyone has? Answer: to be loved. Ultimately, we are all crying out for the same thing, that someone love us for who we are in spite of our very obvious failings. This need is the same in Donald Trump as it is in the lowest homeless beggar in the worst slum of the largest city on Earth and everyone manifests that need in different ways, even though they are asking for the same thing–“Love me.” It is our responsibility to find a way to do just that for others while also understanding that we are looking for the same thing within ourselves. It is the practice of loving others that teaches us our own need and we satisfy our need, paradoxically, by self-sacrificial giving so that the need in others is also satisfied.”
“Incidentally, just because someone wants something does not mean that we are obligated to give it to them. Fulfilling their wants may not be beneficial to them, but may very well increase their demands. “Give me more!” Sometimes, the best thing we could do for others like this is to give them a good, swift kick in the pants and the directive to grow up.”
“This is not a matter of bowling balls and cheeseburgers. In fact, the entire concept transcends the physical world (which is nothing more than a collection of “things”). It rises above the emotional state which reflects the broken aspects of ourselves. It IS a matter of spirit, the spirit of love, and when that is correct and proper, all other parts of our psyche and makeup are healed.”
“How do I want to be treated? With love. How do you want to be treated? With love. How should we treat others and how should they treat us? With love. Both the Golden Rule and the Platinum Rule are methods of teaching that principle to people who learn by doing, making mistakes along the way, but correcting them when they are recognized.”
“God is love. We are created in the image of God. We are also human, therefore flawed and imperfect, yet we can become like God, through the deliberate and conscious choice to surrender the desires we selfishly hold in the interests of showing love to others, so that they too can become like God.”
“This is as simple an explanation as I can make and, while I fall short at times, the end goal of perfection, perfect love, is always within my sight.”
If I truly love someone, I will do what is best for them regardless what it costs me, regardless of what I might gain from them, regardless of what they want me to do for them.
